Free Pet
by Whimsical Dreamer
Summary: Sora and Axel are together. Xemnas is head over heels for Sora. And a mermai- I mean merman seems to have taken an interest to the brunet. Oh, the joy of a foursome. HIATUS
1. Chapter 1

**AI : Hello, guys! Okay, um remember when I said I was gonna start writing oneshots to get away from the three stories I had going on? I cancel that. I got this idea and I just can't get away from it. And lookie here who's joining us! Fen and Fea~!**

**Fen & Fea: Screw it, bitch.**

**AI: Pssh, whatever! To those who had read my other stories before must have noticed how crappy I write :P Well don't blame me. That was considered an achivement since I never received teachings in the art of writing!**

**Fen & Fea: Yeah, and we are vampires.**

**AI: Aren't you?**

**Fen & Fea: Do you see us drinking blood?**

**AI: I was wondering what those sounds from the next room were...**

**Fen & Fea: ...A genuine idiot you are. Okay, Whimsical Dreamers does not and will never own the Kingdom Hearts franchise. Otherwise you'll be seeing yaoi all over the screen and yaoi pairings making out at each cutscene and no WE ARE NOT VAMPIRES!  
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**Free Pet**

**Chapter 1**

**In Which The Silver-Haired Merman Meets The Butler, The Billionaire and The Boy.**

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The sky was clear of clouds and the wind was blowing just nicely as a group of mermen and mermaids swam together underwater. They were going to migrate to the sea on the other side of the world as they often did for generations. Spend half the year in the Destian Ocean then migrating to the Black Sea in the other half of the year. It was a tradition to them.

The ocean waves was disrupted as a merman looking no more than a 16 years old human jumped over the surface with a laugh, followed by his friend. Diving back underwater, he turned to look at the blond merman behind him.

"So, what do you think?"

"About what?" The blond raised an eyebrow, following him as he slowly swam ahead.

"About Selphie." Riku grinned when he saw a thin veil of red on Tidus' cheeks. "I know you have a little something-something for her. Don't try to hide it."

Spluttering, Tidus returned his gaze with an indignant one. "What? You're dreaming. There's nothing between us. Besides, Selphie's with Irvine." Blush still on his face, he looked away, muttering something about the older merman.

Riku hummed, turning around so he can look at the surface. "You never know. Last time I heard, Irvine's with some Orcan named, what, Quistis?"

Snapping back to focus, Tidus quickly swam to his friend. "You mean, Quistis Trepe? The one that's going to stay with us till the end of the year?"

"Yeah, that one. Oh, you're suddenly happy. I knew it!" He added when he saw the big smile on his face.

The smile turned to a grin as Tidus swam ahead. "Hey, Riku! Wanna have a race?"

Quirking an eyebrow at the sudden change, he swam until they were side by side. He theorized he was just happy to hear he had a chance and returned the grin. Accepting the challenge, he looked around for a finish line. When he spotted a ship wreck half buried in sand in the distance, he pointed it and Tidus nodded to show he understood. "Okay, ready,"

"Set,"

"GO!" Both said as they darted forward. Tidus, being the smaller one had an advantage and was a little ways ahead of the silveret.

"I'm gonna win! I'm gonna win!" He shouted energetically as he passed a large rock, keeping his eyes focused on the finish line.

Grinning slyly, Riku slowed down a bit. "Let's see about that," Then he kicked his tail, quickly catching up to the blond and swam ahead of him. He laughed at Tidus's shocked face, using this to his advantage as he swam farther.

When Riku swam past him in a blur of silver and aquamarine, Tidus was momentarily surprised and he slowed down a bit. Even though it was only for a few seconds, it was enough for Riku to gain ahead. However the distraction made him notice the boat ahead of them laying out a large fishing net. "Riku, watch ou-!" But it was too late.

Before he could react, Riku was caught in the net, while Tidus managed to stop in time. He struggled to free himself but to no avail, even when Tidus tried to help. Realizing they couldn't do it on their own, the younger of the two sent out a call for the others. In a minute, they were surrounded by mermen and mermaids, all older than them and they tried to get him loose.

They looked for something sharp to cut the net but nothing seemed to work. It's like the net was made of steel or something.

When it became clear that whatever they do won't work, Riku's mother took his face in her hands and kissed his forehead. "I'm sorry, Riku. I-I can't-"

"It's okay, mother. I understand." He smiled at her and she returned it with a sad one, turning to leave with the others.

Tidus floated in front of him, looking guilty. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean this to happen, if it wasn't for me-"

"It's not your fault. Now go, before the humans catch you too!" By now, his vision was fading and he was quickly losing his energy. The last he saw of his friend was his determined face and his mouth forming a few words.

"_I'm sorry. I promise I'll get you back._"

* * *

"Hey, Sora!"

Looking up from the sea, he barely caught the Paopu thrown at him. He examined it before looking quizzically at his butler heading his way. Regardless of their status, he had personally said that all formalities were to be abandoned whenever they were together. "What is this about, Ax?"

Axel grinned, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "Nothing, just wanna know if you want to share it with me."

He frowned. The Paopu fruit was very popular and was one of the icons of Destiny Islands. Its shape was that of a star's and it had a smooth texture to it. Legend had it that whenever two people share the same fruit, their destinies would be forever intertwined. Many couples went to Destiny Islands just to share a bite of these fruits.

Sora smiled, chuckling at the fruit in his hands.

"Is that a yes?"

Laughing, Sora threw the Paopu back at him. "No, save it for someone else." He walked past him to the beach, intending to go back to the mansion standing magnificently ahead.

"Aw, come on, Sor." In a subtly whining voice, he followed him. "I know you want to."

Humming, Sora tilted his head to the right, smile still on his face as he mock-contemplated. He and Axel had been together for a few months now and even though that kind of relationship was forbidden, they found themselves unable to turn back. They don't really care much about it, anyway. Quite frankly he does want to share one with him. But it wouldn't hurt to tease him for a while now, would it? "No, Axel. I don't want to share it with you…"

Suddenly a pair of arms encircled his waist, Axel's nose barely touching his. "Are you sure about that?" He smirked, slowly leaning forward.

Sora smirked back at him, making Axel mildly surprised. Hands moving to grip his tie, Sora tugged it and crashed their lips together. At first, it was just lips mashing together, then tongues were used. His hands slowly made their way to Axel's red mane then. The two separated just enough to let their breaths mingle as they panted and huffed after the kiss before leaning back in to resume.

They continued like that for a few minutes, hands roaming around and touching each other. Somewhere in the process, Sora was pushed against a tree and Axel's lips were no longer on his, instead it was kissing his jaw, his neck and slowly making its way lower and lower and lower-

"Ew, guys! Get a room!"

Rolling his eyes, Sora looked at the intruder. "Way to ruin the mood, Kai. You couldn't have come at a better time, can you?"

Grinning, the auburn haired girl put a hand on her hip. "That's why I'm here for, Sora-poo." Just like Axel, Kairi was a friend to him albeit not as close as Axel was. That was why she can get away with addressing him like that. She was also one of the few supporting his relationship with the butler, keeping it a secret from anyone else. Especially his fiancé.

Axel had decided that kissing Sora's collarbone was more interesting than watching Kairi, much to Sora's and Kairi's chagrin. "Axel," Sora was pouting and whined as said man continued his minstrels. "Axel, stop. Now."

And he finally did, when Kairi told them why she was there. "Sora, Mansex wants you. Pronto." Mansex, as in, Xemnas his fiancé.

Sora groaned while Axel turned a serious eye to Kairi. "What does he want him for?"

The girl shrugged, making her way back to the mansion. "Beats me but if Sora doesn't get there fast, someone's gonna get cranky."

"I better go then." Sora sighed as he fixed his clothes and tried to fix his hair so it doesn't look like he just had a major make out session with the spiky redhead.

"Remind me to punch that guy later." Axel was fixing his own clothes, muttering about evil silverets and their annoying obsessions with stealing someone else's boyfriend…Who unfortunately was said boyfriend's fiancé.

Sighing again, Sora kissed him, sending an apologetic smile. "We can't help it." He pecked him again before grabbing his hand. "Now, c'mon! Or do you want to leave me alone with him?"

"What? No way!" Axel followed him inside leaving the Paopu fruit on the base of the tree Sora was previously pushed up against. He figured he'd come back for it later.

* * *

Riku was not happy. No, he was FAR from happy.

He had been handled by bearded humans with rough hands that did not felt good on him, in fact, they felt disgusting and repulsive. Then he'd been showed off to the two-legged humans wearing dark clothes and masks at some hall with these flashing lights that kept blinding him while he was stuck in a small tank. And finally, when he woke up, he was in another hall, albeit smaller. The tank was larger than the last, much to his pleasure. At least one thing was to his liking.

The door on the far side of the wall opened up and a tanned man with silver hair entered. He looked vaguely familiar to him. Where had he seen him before? The man hummed as he looked him up, walking around the circular tank as he did so. Riku did not enjoy being examined by some guy, so he opted to stare him down instead. Maybe he'll get the message not to mess with him. Finally, he stopped at the place he started on with a smile.

"Sora would love this."

And then it hit him, the man was at that place with the blinding lights. Riku frowned and turned around, swimming away from him. He did not like this man at all. He trusted his instincts more than anything and right now, it's telling him that this man was an enemy. Then again, he supposed every human was.

He ignored him and stayed silent when he continued to observe, occasionally making remarks about how Sora would love this, Sora would love that, bla bla bla. Riku didn't need to think much to know that this man was obviously going to impress this 'Sora'. Using him? _Pssh_, _yeah_ _right_. _Just_ _watch_ _me_, _perdo_, _I'll_ '_impress'_ _this_ _Sora_ _for_ _you_.

It was only when the man left did Riku looked up from his gleaming teal tail that he was proud of. Once he was sure he was alone, he decided to check out the tank and get to know more about his prison. The floor was sandy, embedded at some places with rocks, coral reefs and seaweeds. There were even shells in the sand. He swam lower and picked up a conch. It was so much alike to the real sea…

The shell was thrown away. "But it's not."

He drifted around, noticing the large reef that took up half of the tank with a circular space in it. He snorted. "At least they thought of my privacy." He swam inside, taking time to examine everything. Satisfied that it contains everything he needed, he plopped down on his 'bed'. Which looked like it was made up of soft corals but was not. But what does he care? At least it's soft enough to sleep on.

His mother would be worrying over him still, he figured. And Tidus…He did said he was going to get him back. Riku snorted. How would he even know where he was and how to get there? His only hope was for Tidus not to do anything stupid and get himself hurt. He sighed, but his pack should be gone already. He expected them to be somewhere between the Destian Ocean and the Pacific by now.

Deciding it'd be better to grab some sleep then worrying over something he can't fix he turned over to lie on his side and closed his eyes. Wishing himself a good night rest, he retreated to a deep and dreamless sleep. Or at least, he was going to if it wasn't for that annoying tapping sound coming somewhere outside.

Gruffly pushing himself up, he swam until his head was out and peered around. Seaweed, seaweed, coral, stones, stones, men and boy, stones, corals— wait, men and boy? He snapped his head back to see said man and boy. One of the men was the creepy silveret from before while the other had vibrant red hair (that looked like it could hurt) and tattoos under his eyes. Standing beside him was…he had to admit it, the boy was cute.

Mahogany hair spiked in random direction, a feminine-ish figure, wide, cobalt blue eyes staring right back at him and face contorted in silent astonishment; the kid was the definition of delectable. Intrigued by the blue eyed child, he swam closer until his hands were pressed on the glass, not noticing the bemused look held in the other two's gaze.

The eyes. Those eyes captivated him. It was of a deep blue, even staring at it made you feel like you're drowning in it. He smiled. "_Reminds me of the ocean." _He decided he wanted to know more about this boy with ocean eyes.

* * *

Oh. My. God. Was what went through the young brunet's mind when his eyes landed on the mermaid in the tank. Or was it supposed to be merman since it clearly was a boy. And quite a hot one at that. No wait, bad mind! Bad mind! He's already with Axel! Don't even think of how hot the merman was with his six packs in clear daylight, luscious silver hair and gorgeous teal- Bad mind!

"What do you think?"

Stuttering, Sora turned his attention to the billionaire. "I-I-I don't know what to say, it's-" He risked another glance at the merman, seeing him _still_ staring at him. "He-He's-" Gorgeous, fucking hot, pretty, beautiful? "-a merman." Congratulations. You had a firm grasp of the obvious, Sora.

"Yes. Yes he is." Xemnas raised a hand, indicating the only other silveret in the room. "He was found just off the coast of Kalm a few days ago." He purposely avoided mentioning about the auction he went through to obtain him. Sora doesn't need to know about that. Hell will know what'll happen if he does. "I thought you might like it."

"What do you mean?"

Smiling, Xemnas took hold of Sora's chin and leaned closer, invading his personal space. Axel and Riku frowned at that. "This, is my gift to you. As my one and only love." And then he leaned closer.

But Sora put a finger on his lips, pushing him back. With an innocent smile he looked up at him, putting on the I'm-Too-Cute-To-Be-Angry-At look and instantly melting Xemnas on the inside. He always had a softspot for him. "But what is his name?"

"Hmmm, I don't know but-"

"Riku."

All eyes turned to the merman who had his head level with Sora's. "My name is Riku. And you-" He pointed at the brunet. "-will be mine."

Silence...And then three voices (one sounding much like that of a proposed lady). "WHAT!"

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**AI: Sooooo, that was the first chapter of Free Pet, how'd you like it, huh? That will probably be the only make out scene I'll write in this story...Unless the reviewers threaten to kill me. I wrote this story in hopes of improving my writing so got anything to say just click on the review button on the bottom of the screen.**

**Fen: ...Just so you know, our hands are clean in this.**

**AI: Riiiiiiight...And I'm the president of America.**

**Fea: Ehem, AI wants to say that for all those Sora fans, they should check out her community.**

**AI: Go ahead! Review, check the C2 and then play with the merman Riku plushie you got from reviewing this story! ^^ DO NOT IGNORE THE SHAMELESS PLUG!**

**Fen: Flames will be used to burn the marshmellows in our camping trip.**

**Fen & Fea: Until then, gras!**

**AI: Bye bye, minna-san! Review on your way out~! ^^  
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	2. Chapter 2

AI: Well, guys and girls! Here's chapiter numero deux! I digress, this fic was not supposed to have humor as one of its main genre but alas, I needed something to release my playful side. That was why there wasn't much humor in the first chapter and I was too lazy to go and fix it X9 Anyway, enjoy reading so you wouldn't have to hear me complain about how rare to actually find an out of the norm pairings where Sora is the uke. C'mon, it's hard to see him as a seme!

Fea: Many thanks to **Sesshomarubaby18, Hatsune17**, **Sorrow Cheshire** and **Month 4** for reviewing! And visit Sorrow Cheshire's story **The Midnight Rider** if you can. Especially if you like ZackXSora pairing. 'Sides, it's got a love triangle too.

AI: Mmhmm, a tasty Zack VS Riku VS Seifer (maybe) for Sora. But just so you know, Zack got him first coz of his boldness X9 I just love these triangles (or is it square?)

**Disclaimer: **We own nothing. Zip, zilch, nada. AI owns only the plot and the sheer queerness of this fic while the twins possess the stupidity that frequents this fic and some of said plot. Squeenix is the one lucky enough to own all those cute boys and bishounens. But we wouldn't want to own them anyway coz it's too troublesome to take care of them. Axel and Riku would fight about who's hotter and then the house could burn down and then where would I sleep?

**Warnings: **No Beta, and the twins are too lazy to act like one. Beware of mistakes.

AI: Oh yeah, personally there are some parts I'm not satisfied with but had no idea what to replace it with. So I just left it. And fyi, Fen and Fea acts more like my friends who would appear in this site just cause they have nothing else to do. They are not betas! Though sometimes they give suggestions and change a paragraph or two. But Fea kinda wrote a few of these paragraphs. I don't know, they do things when they felt like it and wouldn't give a care to my distress. Even though we are triplets by date of birth! DX

Fen & Fea: You were just lucky to be born on the same day.

AI: What kind of people are you? Normally people would feel some sort of connection to those who were born on the same day as them even if they are not related by blood.

Fen & Fea: Since when are we normal?

AI: …Good point. Girls! And guys! Enjoy the chapter!

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**Free Pet**

**Chapter 2**

**A Red Head Is A Red Head, Silverets Are Possessive And Brunets Are Awesome. **

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After the incident with the merman, Xemnas opted to throw Riku away (Axel strongly supported him) but because it's a gift to Sora, he can't do it unless Sora gave permission to. Which, he didn't.

"And why is that?" Mansex's eyebrow was twitching by now.

Sora crossed his arms. "Because, that would be cruel. Why would someone throw away a lost merman on the cold streets, alone? With no one to take care of them?"

"First off, how do you know he's lost? Second, I wouldn't throw it away to the cold streets; I'd give it to someone else to take care of."

"Um, well, there is no other merman out there that is not in the sea, right? So _he _is alone." He purposely pressed on the word 'he'. "And besides, you gave him to me as a gift! Why would you throw it away?" Jut your lower lip outwards, Sora, that's it! Give him the Pout Of Doom™. Now Mansex wouldn't be able to resist.

Said man sighed. Sora just pulled out a trump card. Nobody can resist the Pout Of Doom™. Unless they've lost their mind, which actually happened once (Sora nearly got raped). "Fine, you can keep him-" Sora cheered. "-under one condition."

The brunet tilted his head to the side, unconsciously adopting the I'm-Super-Molestable look. Calm yourself, Mansex (stop saying that!), his butler and personal bodyguard was there. He'd beat the shit out of you if you make any move on the young master. "You can't get inside the tank."

His fiancée just quirked an eyebrow, wondering why in the world would he get inside the tank.

Grinning at the easy offer, he nodded excitably. "It's a deal!"

* * *

"You know, when you pouted back then, you were just begging to be fucked? And the time when you crooked your head to the side? I think I saw something pretty interesting on Mansex's pants back then."

"Eww, Axel! You just ruined my perfectly innocent mind!"

"What are you talking about, Sor? I just said I saw something interesting on his pants. I didn't say what it was. Pervert."

"…" Pout Of Doom™ made its entrance! "I hate you."

"Now we know that's not true."

"But-mmph! Mmmm, mmmph…"

Outside, Kairi, Tifa and Yuffie strained their ears and pressed them to the door, mind heated with all the images conjured by the sounds. "Good thing we set up all those mini cameras in there, right?"

Kairi and Tifa both nodded.

* * *

Night at sea had always been his favorite time, when he can come out and watch all the stars dotted in the sky. He especially liked it when auroras were present. He would always surface with his friends and hang around off the coast of a small unpopulated island. Irvine and Selphie would point out which star was what, Cloud and Zack would scare them off with ghost stories they heard from sailors or jumping out from random places, pretending to be one. Namine would laugh along, adding in weird but interesting facts with Irvine's and Selphie's explanations.

Hayner would spar with anyone while Ollete and Pence talked about random stuffs, and Riku would do all of them. Tidus always admired him, he was adored by many. Not a day would pass without at least ten mermaids asking him out, and Tidus hoped he can be the same. But now, he had been captured by a human.

The night it happened, they all gathered at the usual spot.

"So, Riku's captured and we need to get him back. We all know how…idiotic humans can be. God knows what they would do to him." Tidus shook his head. The guilt still hadn't left him.

"But," Ollete spoke up. "How would we do that? Tomorrow, we have to leave."

"Yeah." Pence agreed.

Hayner crossed his arms. "And even if we can stay, how do we know where he is?"

"That's why we're here." Tidus pointed out. "We need to think of something."

"Well," Cloud looked at Zack who shrugged. "We're both old enough and independent. We can stay here and look around for him."

"Yeah. You two can do that. But still, how do we find him?"

Namine, who had been silent so far, suddenly look up with a smile on her face. "I think I know how to solve that problem."

* * *

The next day, Sora woke up to something warm, wet and tickly on his neck. He giggled as he moved his hand around to find the source and felt something suspiciously like hair, and a head, ears, sensuous smooth skin-

His eyes finally decided to open and were met with red hair, pale skin, emerald eyes and the upturned triangle tattoos under them that only a certain butler wore.

"Axel."

The red head smirked. "Morning, babe."

Sora yawned, stretching his arms far above his head and flattening out his legs, uncaring of the hungry gleam in his boyfriend's eyes. "Morning to you too."

"Breakfast is ready."

He turned his head to where the trolley stood. The window was fully open and sunlight was pouring in, bouncing off the silverwares and blinding him for a moment. Quickly turning his head away, he shielded his eyes as if it can get rid of the blaring white dots. "It burns!"

A chuckle was heard from none other than the pyromaniac currently straddling him. Well of course, who else was there in the room? "Always the dramatic one aren't you?"

"I woke up to someone licking me as if I'm some kind of candy and the sun purposely hit those silverwares just to get at me. Of course I'll be dramatic."

"You chose just the right words." With that, Axel leaned down again and started attacking his neck. "Mmmm, sweet as a candy."

"Axel, I just woke up! And I haven't even washed myself." Pout.

"That's okay. Because your dear butler here haven't had breakfast yet, and you wouldn't want him to starve would you? So be a good boyfriend and let me enjoy you."

"…AXEL'S A CANNIBAL! SAVE ME!"

The morning concluded in the destruction of Sora's bedroom door and the squeals of three women (uh wait, scratch that, two women and one girl) who destroyed said door in order to watch the show.

* * *

Humans were strange, dim witted, repulsive and most of all maddeningly irritating. End of story.

For those wondering why the silver-haired merman was not showing up despite all the fishes the dumped in the tank and all those pretty colorful shells were added in, that sentence would probably answer their confusion.

Well, to elaborate, the fact the perverted silveret and red porcupine from last night suddenly dragged away the ocean-eyed siren after his confession was not only idiotic, but also annoying and strange. According to their tradition, confessions must not be taken lightly and no outsiders may interfere. So why did they?

Plus, those two-legged black and white _creatures _(A/N: You know what's black and white in a mansion, right? Yeah, I hate those things. But the male ones I like XD) with too much formality and clearly too little IQ kept staring at him strangely (it reminded him of those mermaids at home… He hated it, with a passion) and dumped dead fishes of all things! What do they want, pollute his place and kill him? Sure, he eats them but they're too much! And why the hell did they added shells? Only stupid, obsessed, brown haired mermaids collect those.

To sum it up, mermen and humans do not get along well. Except for that boy. Yeah, the one with outrageous spiky hair and cobalt eyes? That one he can bear with. In fact, he'd love to be with him all the time. So what if they're the same gender, it doesn't look like it mattered there.

But alas, his mate (Yes, he was proud to claim the boy as his mate… Even if in reality he hadn't done it… Yet) hadn't showed up for the day; thus his lack of appearance.

"Those idiots better not be keeping him away."

* * *

They were, in fact, doing so.

"Sora love, which do you think is better, a huge cinema or a massive shopping mall?" Xemnas smiled ever so creepily at the considerably much younger boy sitting next to him.

"Um, I don't know," Sora resisted the urge to gag at his affection or roll his eyes at the sheer stupidity. "Why don't we just combine it?"

"That's a good idea! I knew there's more to beauty I fell in love with." With that the silveret turned to his work table which was surprisingly tidy considering all those papers and stuff. If it was Sora, he wouldn't be able to keep it clean for the life of him.

This time, Sora inwardly rolled his eyes. He knew that line from a book that Mansex read last week. "Can I go see Riku now—"

"Master Sora, you have a guest."

The brunet shot a small, almost imperceptible pout to his butler.

Xemnas meanwhile looked up, looking interested. "Who is it?"

Axel remained emotionless, casting a quick glance at his secret lover and resisting the urge to hug him. "It is Sir Leonhart from Loire Security Service. He wishes to see Master Sora regarding the security of the merman." He almost said _his _merman. Thankfully he caught himself before the damage was done. To him, of course.

"Oh! So he's here already then? Well, I have to go, see ya later!" With a quick wave, Sora dashed outside full speed until he reached the elevator. Axel at least, lingered behind just long enough to see the kicked look on Xemnas' face. That made his day a lot brighter.

When he reached Sora and entered the elevator with him, he wasted no time in stealing a kiss. "I love you."

Purring, his junior by three years hugged him with an almost cat like smile. "Love you too."

The door opened much too fast to both guys' likings but they stepped out nonetheless. They walked together to the lobby, aware of the eyes and ears along the way. Axel was walking a little bit behind but he knew the boy was smiling. That's just how he was; he was the bright ball of sunshine that everybody came to love and if it wasn't for him, the mansion would've became a cold unhappy place like most of the mansions belonging to rich guys.

And he was lucky enough to be **his **butler, his **lover**.

Squall Leonhart was your average 27 years old uh…man who knew too much martial arts to actually be called average (then why the hell did you call him average then?). At such he was currently working with his uncle, Laguna Loire who owned the biggest security company in the continent and was champion of the World Martial Arts Tournament 5 times in a row.

They also accept missions from guarding objects or people to assassinations. But the latter was done in secret, only a few knew about that side of their business. As for Squall, he had done some himself and acquired a scar to show his experiences. However nobody except Laguna really knew the real reason behind the scar.

So, with such a background, it was only natural for him to pull out a gun and pointed it towards the door when said door was slammed open, revealing a younger brunet and a spiky red-head. But, he accidentally knocked over a coffee table and fired a shot, which whizzed pass the clueless brunet and narrowly missing the alert red-head, damaging a little of his spiky hair.

It was only a little, but enough to send him into a rampage. A flaming, hot rampage.

"WHY YOU MOTHERFUCKER! YOU'LL REGRET THAT!"

"Woah, Axel! Calm down—The sofa, the sofa!"

"…"

"BURN TO HELL, MISCREANT!"

"Axeeeell! You're burning the room!"

"…You're one fiery porcupine."

"GOD WILL SMITE THEE, EVIL ONE!"

"Ugh… Whatever god is hearing, please save us. And don't listen to Axel."

"BURN, BABY BURN!"

* * *

Xemnas had been quietly sipping on some Earl Grey tea, quite content, though a little disappointed he wasn't with Sora at the moment. With nothing to work on, he had been reading this new book he found titled Sephiroth's Guide To Love And Deception, whose author was none other than _the _famed Sephiroth, one of the pillars of the world of what was once called 'forbidden love'.

Anyway, as he was about to turn to the next page (one of the main character was a lot like Sora, which he liked because he loved him) when Kairi Everheart, one of the maids slammed open the door with more force than necessary.

He sighed. "What is it, Miss Everheart. I'm in the middle of something important right now and if—"

Kairi panted, caught her breath and cut off the man (something nobody would dare do but this was very important) "Master! Axel had gone amok and is now rampaging through the mansion!"

"What? What about Sora?"

The girl hesitated for a second. "He's nowhere to be found, sir."

"Get the SPs! Search for Sora and tranquilize that brainless Neanderthal you call Axel! Where's Saix?"

Several rooms away, a person sneezed in his nap, curled at the foot of his bed.

* * *

"Porcupine, he just had to say that, didn't he?" Sora looked around the corner and decided to take a left turn when he saw no one. Sometime in the confusion at the lobby Sora somehow managed to get outside and lost sight of Axel and the stoic man he was supposed to meet. Well, at least he wasn't hurt. Man, mansex wouldn't like the new look Axel gave to the lobby.

He jogged to a double door, slightly open letting sunlight from the full wall window spill over the hallway. Despite all its grandeur Xemnas' mansion had a few design flaws, like the windows. They weren't in the right position to fully light all the hallways, stairs and some corners of the rooms. And Sora hated it but he got no choice but to stay there. He could only blame his father for promising him to the silver haired pervert.

Entering the large room, he turned his head from side to side as he searched for Axel's ketchup drenched porcupine hair (he had to admit it, they do look alike but shush!). But the only thing in the hall was a large tank that took up most of the space here. And then he remembered where he was, it was Riku's room!

Grinning, he ran up to it and rapped thrice. Seconds later, he could see Riku's silver hair appearing from a cave at the back of the tank. Once he saw who came to visit, he immediately swam towards him.

"Heya, Riku!"

The merman smiled gently. "Hi."

"Have you seen Axel?" However much he would love to just chat with him, his boyfriend came first. And Xemnas would definitely not treat him nicely once he found the redhead.

Riku looked confused. "Who?"

"The tall guy with red hair from last night?"

"Oh. Nope. Haven't seen him." Suddenly he had an idea. "Hey, I have a problem here, can you help me?"

"Sure! What is it?" Sora was always happy to help!

"They dumped too much fish in here. I wanna get it out. There're a few empty buckets over there."

Sora looked to where he was pointing and sure enough, there were. He got one and held it up. "Okay, I got it."

"Good. Just give it to me so I can fill it and then pass it back to you."

Nodding, Sora set out to the ladder at the side of the tank and climbed up. It was just a simple job of passing a bucket to him. No problem. He walked on the ramp until he arrived at the middle and knelt down, putting his hand that held the bucket in the water. "Riku, I have it." He realized how pleasant his name sounds and repeated it several times in his head. Then remembered Axel and quickly shook his head. "Stupid Sora, stop thinking like tha—woah!"

That woah being the result of getting pulled in the water. The bucket was instinctively let go as his hands went to close his mouth and he tried to swim back up. As soon as his head broke the surface, he greedily swallowed mouthfuls of air, calming his erratically beating heart. He almost screamed when Riku surface beside him.

"Sorry, I grabbed your hand back there."

"Just…Don't do that again. You almost gave me a heart attack!"

"Haha, sorry." Chance!

"How can you laugh so—" Suddenly Riku had his arms wrapped around his waist and a mouth occupied his.

* * *

AI: Gah, I'm tired. I just can't work best in the wee hours of the morning. Anyway, how'd you like that? Riku got to Sora! Muahahahaha! And Xemnas never even managed to kiss Sora! But Riku did it in one day. Awesome! Uh, when I said no kissing scenes again, I was lying. In a fic like this kissing scenes can't be avoided unless you're really skilled which I am not :P

_Well, to elaborate, the fact the perverted silveret and red porcupine from last night suddenly dragged away the ocean-eyed siren after his confession was not only idiotic, but also annoying and strange. According to their tradition, confessions must not be taken lightly and no outsiders may interfere. So why did they?_

**AI: Yeah, I just thought labeling Sora as a siren in Riku's POV would kinda fit considering their situations. Or more like Riku's. **

"_That's a good idea! I knew there's more than beauty I fell in love with." With that the silveret turned to his work table which was surprisingly tidy considering all those papers and stuff. If it was Sora, he wouldn't be able to keep it clean for the life of him._

_This time, Sora inwardly rolled his eyes. He knew that line from a book that Mansex read last week. "Can I go see Riku now—"_

**Fea: The 'book' is actually a fanfic written by ****Tysonkaiexperimen****t**** or Tke and its title is ****The 13****th**** Hour****. For those who haven't read it, go and do so after you review this story! And then support her through Livejournal since she seemed to have encountered a problem here. And yes, forgive me for quoting a line from your story, Tke.**

"_GOD WILL SMITE THEE, EVIL ONE!"_

**Fea: Heheh, guess where this line came from? Yes! It's from ****A Deceiving Misconception**** written by ****Lolerskatez****. Go ahead and read it. I recommend it especially for those who love humor and yaoi! Yes, I read yaoi. But it's not strange considering my sexuality X3 Hmm, last time I heard, she's planning a rewrite for it. Well, we look forward to it! :D**

_With nothing to work on, he had been reading this new book he found titled Sephiroth's Guide To Love And Deception, whose author was none other than _the_ famed Sephiroth, one of the pillars of the world of what was once called 'forbidden love'._

**AI: ****Sephiroth's Guide To Love And Deception**** is NOT new. Just like The 13****th**** Hour, it is a fanfic that can be found in this site and highly recommended. It's finished and already have a sequel. And the author is ****KamirineGoddess****. Sorry for changing the author to Sephiroth, though.**

"_Get the SPs! Search for Sora and tranquilize that brainless Neanderthal you call Axel! Where's Saix?" _

**AI: Lol, brainless Neanderthal. That's what Fen called my cousin last time. Now it's maggot, worm etc.  
**

_Entering the large room, he turned his head from side to side as he searched for Axel's ketchup drenched porcupine hair (he had to admit it, they do look alike but shush!). But the only thing in the hall was a large tank that took up most of the space here. And then he remembered where he was, it was Riku's room!_

**Fea: Axel described as a porcupine is thanks to the hilarious story ****Tell Me There's A Class To This**** by ****NiffStral****. Story can be accessed from the fav stories section of our profile. It's a very amusing read.**

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**~~ Please review because it keeps an author alive and happy and well and it makes the world go round. Other than that, flames can be used by Fen and Fea in their new plans called 'Santa From Hell' and/or by AI to make a bonfire and make fire kites. Favs and alerts are tolerable so long as you review ~~**

AI: Yes, Imma review whore X9 Got any questions just fire away! X4 My shield is the strongest :D Lol, okay jk.

Fea: By the way, please visit our profile and read the 'News Board' we put up out of boredom. There are some things there that you might be able to help us with. News board thing is just a joke but the requests aren't. Laugh at the title, that's what we did XD

AI: We have so much more stories we want to recommend but these are the ones we can fit in for now.

Fea: Look out for more! ;D And Fen, don't you have anything to say?

Fen: …I wanna play Left 4 Dead. Don't disturb me. *walks away to his and Fea's shared room*

Fea: That reminds me, I haven't finished that RE. Ja na! *walks away*

AI: And that leaves me…Recap!

* * *

**RECOMMENDED STORIES: KINGDOM HEARTS FANDOM**

The Midnight Rider by Sorrow Cheshire (Nice picture of the Cheshire cat ;D Though I like Xerxes better. Or OZ, or Gilbert, GAh! I can't decide!)

The 13th Hour by Tysonkaiexperiment (SHE IS AWESOME! She's one of the pillars of KH fandom)

A Deceiving Misconception by Lolerskatez (I totally cracked at this!)

Sephiroth's Guide to Love and Deception by KamirineGoddess (I just love Sephiroth. That, and it's a very good read. Though I digress, I haven't finished it and I don't remember where I left it)

Tell Me There's A Class For This by NiffStral (One of my all time favorite!)


	3. Chapter 3

AI: I suck. I really really suck, don't I?

Fen: You're still alive after all…

Fea: *sigh* In what?

AI: At everything! I'm such a liar!

Fea: Okay…

Fen: What the f is she talking about?

AI: Hey guys, you think I suck, right? Say it, just say it goddammit!

Fen: Someone's depressed.

AI: I reread all that I wrote before. Every. Single. Fic. And my summary is, I sucked ass.

Fen: And here I thought she'd never realize it.

Fea: *rolls eyes*

AI: I think I should rewrite them. But I don't know, should I?

Fea: Depends.

Fen: Dunno, don't care.

AI: To all who read my stories, d'you think I should rewrite them? Coz I personally think they're bad. And therefore needs fixing. Especially this one. I love the pairings, but when I read them back again after all these months I think I need to die. There are just so many mistakes! If the majority of you think I should then say it!

Fea: On the side note, we're sorry for the long absence before. School's really taking up most of our time.

AI: Sorry, sorry SORRY!

Fen: Alright, I'm starting to see that crazynes in her eyes. I'm taking her away. *drags her out of the room* Shoo, you.

Fea: … Yeah, please give us your opinions on this. AI had locked herself in her room for quite a long time reading books from authors she respects and came out later on depressed saying she's ashamed of her writing. So yeah, now you know why she's acting like this.

Fen: Hey, I have a note here from AI asking if you readers would like to kill her.

Fea: *takes note and burns it* What do you have against her?


End file.
